Grandpa Chuck

This is nearly impossible to sit down and write, but I'm going to do it. It has been a while since I've had the chance, or the courage to write a new blog post. I was so excited to share with you all the plans we had for Lola's first birthday, how much work we put into it, how adorable she looked, and some day soon I will. But right now I'd like to write a post about what really happened on Lola's first birthday. 

We received a phone call at 4am, that Chuck's dad had passed out and was taken in an ambulance. Chuck left to meet him there. But when he got there, it was too late. His father was already gone. The first thing I want to say about this, can you imagine? You can't. I can't. It's not anyone else's story. Its his. I know many people who have lost their father, but this one was his. 

I've struggled for the last two weeks now, with figuring out what my role is in this. I loved Chuck's dad too, but he wasn't my dad. He was my husbands dad. Someone my husband loved from the first day of his life. And that makes his pain, my pain. I've always sort of prided myself on being strong. But that day I knew, I'm only strong because I have a husband who is strong. We were heart broken together, and there was nothing I could do for him. 

This made me instantly feel weak.

I've always told you, and everyone I know how amazing my husband is. But I don't think there is enough words to truly get that point across. He just lost his father, and he came home to me, he rubbed my back as I cried, and he told me how much he loved me. We had 50+ people coming over that day to celebrate Lola's first birthday, we had hundreds of dollars spent on her party. I was about a minute away from calling every single one of them to cancel, and he said to me "I still want to have Lola's party. Its her day." 

THAT is how amazing my husband is. And even that is an understatement.

 

Grandpa Chuck was one of a kind. He loved riding his Harley, running the family business, and making Lola laugh. He got his nick name "Chucky-Luv" from his contagious smile and love for everyone. The most important thing for me to acknowledge about him is how much he loved Lola, and his three other grand kids. There was definitely a light in his eyes when they were together. A light I hope to never forget. To the man who made my husband a part of who he is, I could never thank you enough. You will be missed forever.

Lastly, if there is one thing I've learned from this, its to not let a single moment pass you by. Hug your loved ones. Hug them tight. Never for one second let them think there is anything but love between you. Every life is too short, no matter how old you are. Make it count. He sure did.

 Ride free.

Happy Fall

Oh look, another glorious morning.. Makes me sick! 

 

Happy First Day of Fall to all my basic bitches. Just kidding. Sort of.

Well, it's the most wonderful time of the year. At least in my opinion, and every other 30 something chick who lives somewhere with four seasons opinion. I've been obsessed with fall, and more specifically the month of October, for as long as I can remember. There is just something about cool mornings with golden light shining through your windows, leaves crunching when you walk, and the way it smells outside after a fall rain. I honestly don't really LOVE pumpkin spiced lattes, but I would hammer a gallon of apple cider no problem. Bring on all the apple picking, Ugg boot wearing, Hocus Pocus quoting, pumpkin candle burning days of fall.

Lastly, we've been in major planning mode for LOLA'S FIRST BIRTHDAY. Have I been sleeping for an entire year? Where did the time go? How is she almost a year old?  I'm a total sucker for a "theme" no matter what party I'm planning. Any of you who know me, know I don't have a party without going all out. Since our girl was born in the most fabulous month of the year (and on the 2nd, which has always been my lucky number) We are planning a Pumpkins & Roses party. Our little pumpkin Lola Rose. It just seems fitting. Though I might have to use it every single year, considering I've spent a small fortune on decorations, props, food, and favors. Every day there are roughly 16 boxes from Amazon sitting on our door step. Did you know you can buy literally anything on Amazon? Today I ordered Pellegrino, double stick tape, and a tutu. One stop shop, all from the comfort of my own cramped iphone hand. 

My husband, and our mail man, are sure to cut me off me soon.

Here's a little sneak peek at what I have in the works:

Visit my pinterest board for all the things that inspired me for her party, and stay tuned for how it all comes together.

Being an Aunt

Ten years ago today, I became an aunt. I was just barely 20 years old. I had no idea what I was in store for. We waited all night in the hospital for her. My brother came out of the delivery room crying. We had a beautiful baby girl new to our family! I knew back then how much I always wanted kids, but boy did becoming an aunt teach me how much I needed kids! I've always been so grateful for the chance to get to spoil my now, 5 nieces and 4 nephews. Being an aunt has been one of the biggest blessings of my life. And I'm thrilled Lola gets to grow up with such amazing role models, cousins, and friends. I love you all to the moon and back

Taking a trip down memory lane of me with my babies throughout the years.

 

 
And one of my favorite photos of all time. Happy 10th Birthday Mia-Bell! You were the start of all the joy and happiness in our lives. You are a smart, hilarious, caring, young girl. 

 
 

 

 
 

 

 

 

 
 

 

 

 

Eleven Months

Age: 11 months
 

Stats: Last I weighed her she was 25 lbs. I love my chubby happy baby! I don't know her height but I can't wait to have her measured for the first time on her height chart in her room. Shes still wearing mostly 12-18 and 18-24 month clothes, size 4 diapers, and she has 9 teeth now!

Favorite Foods: She seems to really enjoy cantaloupe. LOVES taco night (like mama!) Goes ham at Chipotle, she gets the kids cheese quesadilla, a side of black beans, corn, and guac. Really likes chugging water. And when we can't find her, she is almost always sitting at the dog food bowl and we have to pry dog food out of her mouth. Parents of year over here.
 

Words: She is quite a talker. We can sometimes figure out what shes trying to say. But her favorite word by far is Dada. Up until Thursday, we could look her dead in the eye and say "Mama" about 100 times and every single time she replies "DADA!" But the day before she turned 11 months old, I walked out of the room and she came crawling after me saying "mumma mumma mumma" Yes, I cried.
 

Favorite Activities: She recently really likes playing in her crib while you sit next to it. She pulls herself up, jumps a couple times, and then lays down with her face in the mattress giggling like shes pretending to sleep. She loves to push her push walker. Get chased by her giant stuffed teddy bear, and still really loves playing with Louie.

Favorite Things: Books for sure. She loves loves loves to turn pages in all her books. Her favorites right now are A Color of His Own, Little Blue Truck Halloween, and Pantone Colors.

Least Favorite Things: Diaper changes, putting on clothes, taking off clothes, rocking when shes overly tired, and being told she can't stand in the tub.

Signature Moves: If anyone says "yaaay" or "good job" it doesn't matter what she is doing or if she's even paying attention, she will stop what she is doing and start clapping. It is the funniest thing ever. I hope I never forget it.

Seriously, this sweet girl. I am just so overwhelmed with how much she has brought to our lives. It doesn't even seem possible for her to be almost one year old. If you need me, I'll be sobbing in between each smile and laugh for the next 30 days. Okay, probably 30 years. People always say "you'll never know how much I love you" but I hope one day she does. So much my heart feels like it will burst into a million pieces. 

Our Weekend

Our weekend was going to be laid back and chill. I had to shoot a wedding Friday night and knew I'd be getting home late, so I was looking forward to Chuck being home Saturday and me sleeping in! Then I got home close to midnight Friday and he told me he had to work Saturday. Boo!!! It seriously seems like every weekday I have to wake Lola up by 7:15 in order to get out of the house in time for day care and work. And for some reason Friday through Sunday she is like up and active by 6:30 no matter what. I can hardly complain, because she goes to bed so easy by 7:30/7:45, and doesn't make a peep all night. But is it too much to ask for a real weekend wake up time?? This mama is NOT a morning person. But then I see this face....

Saturday we had a last minute swim session at my parents house with all the grandkids! Lola hasn't been much into swimming all summer, but seems to be warming up. She DOES NOT want to be held in the pool, she wants to go all by herself, and even if we put her in a float, she wants to tip out of it and be free. So maybe swimming lessons should be on our list next summer.

Saturday night I went out on a girls night to celebrate a besties 30th. We were just going to go to dinner, but ended up at the casino playing craps. Home by 12:30, and felt like such a party animal. It is so strange how you become a mom and all the sudden, 9pm feels like midnight, and midnight feels like 5am. But sometimes jammies and a glass of wine in bed with the TV on are routine, instead of your old going out at 9 and not caring what time you get home.
Every once in a while, it feels pretty good to break routine. 

Sundays are usually our family days. Chuck always has Sundays off, so we try to plan something fun. We decided to finally go to the Holden Arboretum and hike the new canopy walk and tower. Other than it being 90% humidity and 85 degree outside, it was gorgeous. We got a family membership so we can visit the grounds all year. If you're in the area, I highly suggest visiting and checking it out. I mean, it's only like 200 stairs, but who's counting?

 

PS- It's almost September, so be prepared for a lot of FALL posts! Because in my mind, IT'S the most wonderful time of the year.

Mom Brain

We have been too busy for our own good lately. Wrapped up an unsuccessful garage sale last weekend, and sold our couch and had to quickly buy a new one to replace it. On top of being so busy, Lola is crawling. Which means our days/minutes are absolutely insane. She's on the verge of walking any minute, and as proud as it makes me when she stands there all by herself smiling ear to ear and just so thrilled she can stand there all on her own, I secretively want to push her down and tell her to "stop it, be a baby!" It seems she is growing at the speed of light. And summer has been SO good, yet SO fast. Being busy during the summer is fun, but exhausting. And I usually can't remember what day it is lately. Mom brain is a serious, and real thing. While I hate to admit any of this, I'm going to share a couple things that have happened involving my scrambled egg brain since having Lola, in hopes all you moms out there aren't on the busy struggle bus right along with me.

1. My husband texted me after he got home from work before me one evening. "You left the stove on." To which I replied, "I didn't use the stove this morning." And it wasn't just my "try and get out of this replies" like when he asked me if I hit the bushes in his moms yard with my car and I said "no?" and he pulled about 6 branches out from behind his back and said "really? cause I just pulled this out of your fender" WHOOPS! This was a seriously I don't remember using the stove this morning reply. But when I got home, sure enough there was the skillet in the sink with left over scrambled egg that I had made for Lola that morning. I'm lucky I didn't burn our house down.

2. Leaving the stove on yet again the next week.

3. Letting the dog out, running back in to brush my teeth, going back to yell for him to come in, waiting too long and deciding to put clothes and shoes on and go find him. Yelling his name about 100 times and searching the entire neighborhood. Start to panic thinking, oh shit I lost the dog. Go back in to get my shit together and make sure Lola isn't awake yet. Start thinking the worst that a hawk picked up our dog and I would never find him again. And the little stinker was curled up under our covers in our bed the whole time. 

4. Ordering 300 new outfits from OldNavy.com for Lola and being so excited to get them, just to realize, you already ordered all of those a week ago and they arrived today.

5. Your husband asking you where you got that giant bruise on your leg that looks so painful, and you honestly can't even remember getting it, but damn it hurts now that you mention it. 

6.  Specifically not making coffee at home, leaving early in the morning so you have enough time to stop at Starbucks. Getting to Starbucks without your wallet. 

7. And last but not least selling your couch and chair from your living room on Sunday, with no plan of a new couch. Getting to the furniture store to look around, and buy a couch without measuring a single thing. Here's hoping the couch fits in our tiny living room, or at least through the front door.

 Sorry for the lack of blogging ya'll. But I'm sure there will be a Mom Brain Part II, so stay tuned! And here's a pic of the cutest little garage sale cashier from last weekend to hold you over.

3 YEAR ANNIVERSARY

So three years ago today, I woke up in a farmhouse on the property we were going to get married at. It was about 6am, and it was gray as gray could be and raining. My bridesmaids woke up and assured me it would be fine. We had planned to get married outside, but had a back up plan to get married in the barn if it was raining. We woke up, had breakfast, finished some last minute chalkboards, and we're getting ready to get our hair done. It had stopped raining and the sun was coming out.

By 5pm it was totally dry and I was ready! I walked down that aisle and we said our vows. I'm sharing our vows here so I always have a place to come back and read them. And three years later, he stills makes my popcorn!

Chucks vows:

 Shannon you make me so happy, everyday I'm reminded about how lucky I am to have you in my life. I vow to love you, cherish you, and support you no matter what it is. I vow to surprise you everyday, and to always make the microwave popcorn for tv nights on the couch. I vow to always be true to you and true to myself. Everyday you make me the luckiest guy in the world and I vow to make you feel like the luckiest most beautiful bride in the world for the rest of our lives, because that's what you deserve and that's who you are. They say, "the biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams", well today my dreams are coming true. I love you so much baby and I can't wait to see where the rest of this adventure will take us.

My vows:

Chuck, I love you because you make me laugh out loud on a daily basis. I love you because I never have to make the popcorn on Sunday nights, and I never have to tell you that one bag isn’t enough for the both of us. I love you because you are spontaneous and always coming up with fun exciting things for us to do, like run 4 miles…. and then get Taco Bell.  I love you because you tell me I’m beautiful every single day.

The past seven years of our life together have taught me what love has to offer. It’s challenging, it’s scary, its happy, it’s sad, it’s exciting, and most of all, with you, it’s here to stay. You have always had a way of making me feel strong, even when I know how weak I am. I am a better person today because you have taught me it is never about how bad things get can, its always about the light at the end of the tunnel.

 From this day forward, I promise to choose you above all else. I promise to challenge you, to help you grow, and to create wonderful memories with you. I vow to laugh and play and dream with you.  Through all the happiness, joys, laughs, pain, the sorrow, the loss, and heartache, I vow to overcome it all with you.

To the next million adventures, baby. I love you.